Doctors think it might be a baby, although of course it’s still too early to say. The hospital says it’s being carefully monitored. Mainly by MTV.

Kerry has named it Max because that’s where it was conceived: behind a pile of 3 pound jeans in TK Max. The Warrington branch. (She should have called it “Max Warrington” – that sounds quite posh – rather than Max Silk Cut X-Box Britney Fish Finger Katona, or whatever she’s plumped for).

The News of the World today gives us exclusive first pictures of the infant:

Aaaah. Its first tab.